The Power of Naming Things
I just read an essay written about the power of naming things. But there had been something I had not named out loud to the person who should have been my ride or die. Even as the idea of divorce became conceptualized, and we finally told the kids, he looked at me and told me he wished he had never hit me, but still the word could not be spoken. Abuse. It was the first time I had ever used the word out loud toward him. The first time I had identified the thing that led to the dissolution of our marriage. And here I was, saying it. Or rather being dared to say it. So I told him. Straight to his face. That he was abusive. He challenged that notion. Challenged me to give me a specific example. I quickly scanned through a few that still felt fresh, even though we were 5 years removed from being legally married. He challenged the details, I got even more specific about the event. He then pivoted to denying that it even happened. He quickly shifted the narrative. I had convinced th...